THE CURMUDGEON’S VIEW OF PARKNG LOT DODOS AND OTHER JERKS by Neale Mclintock 6/29/’15

When my better half, Nancy is shopping for groceries and such, I sit in the car and pass the time listening to the radio and observing what goes on in the area. Besides traffic of all sorts, I see some people that I wonder about. Some I feel sorry for , some, I admire and some I get angry at. The reason I put myself in this position is another story. Just let it be said that Nancy has a more enjoyable time shopping if I am not present. Chauffeuring will suffice as far as she is concerned.

At any rate, One of the things I admire are the people who park way out in the spaces where there are no other cars. They like exercise and realize there is less of a chance for getting dinged by someone else’s door. Smart people, those.

It is surprising how many senior citizens park away from the store and use this as an exercise moment. Good planning and probably the Doctor likes that idea. I myself at times get out and walk around the entire lot. I should do that more often by the looks of my waist line.

Other people are amusing in a way. It is surprising how many shoppers seem to be talking to themselves as they walk by all alone. Maybe they are singing but they have a serious look on their countenance. I like to sing along with the music on the radio, but then I am moving MY lips. I decided to practice ventriloquism as I sing and now no one can wonder why my lips are moving. I guess I could hum but it would not be the same.

An angry sight is the money guy who has the hot car and takes up two spaces by diagonally parking in a parallel space and takes up two spaces. That should warrant a ticket, especially during the holiday season.

It is almost comical to watch people unload their carts into the vehicle and then try to decide where to take the cart. Distance judging is not a strong point for many people. Most people take the cart to the kiosk and let it go at that even tho the store parking area is closer. Those are the respectable shopper. Then there are the uncaring people who just drive away and leave the carts as tho they were glued in place when empty. They are out in the open where the wind can drive them across the lot and into someone else’s car. Not a good thing , folks.

Finally, I must talk about the “handicapped parking”. People, that does not mean that you may park there if you are short on time or intelligence or both! At first I felt sorry for the young vigorous people who used the area. Were they afflicted with an unseen disease or problem at such a tender age.? Some of them seemed to think they were about to expire at any moment. They would get out of the car and run to the store and soon run back out. I was glad to see them drive away since I would have hated to dial 911 for one so young, Finally, I realized that they were just lazy and had borrowed poor old grandma’s card to save a little time. In the meantime the elderly man or women who could barely walk and needed cans, crutch, walker or wheel chair had to struggle to get in and out of the store.

At times like these last situations I wish I had a trained dog or seagull that would go over and wet the wheels or mess up the windshield of those cars and maybe drop a load on them as they came out.

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